Mariana Lopez de Waard | Three lessons to learn as soon as possible
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Three lessons to learn as soon as possible

I have built myself, almost, to be the person who would be able to fulfill my dreams. Surely that phrase also sounds to you, and surely you are already in the process of getting it.

In this process we all went through, I have seen myself taking stock of everything I learned and everything I had to «unlearn». And, among other things, I have noticed some wonderful things that I did learn as a child and that we should all remember much more often. Some of them always stay, others we are losing because insecurity grows in us, as we get older. Other lessons, some children never learn, and they risk becoming adults with even less emotional resources to have a successful, happy life …

I share with you some of the lessons that I learned as a child, specifically three very special ones, and that I try to never forget. I recommend that you remember them, if you forgot them, that you internalize them so that they make you grow, and that you share them with your whole heart to the next generation, so that they have an impact on them.

«Listen more than you speak.»

We all learn by observation and imitation. Thus we learn to speak and eat for ourselves, for example. But when we grow up, we start to observe less and talk much more. What we have to say is always more important than we can learn … even if what we have to say we have learned badly, by not listening enough.

When you decide to really listen, before speaking, something very special occurs. You get to know people better, you open your mind to other possibilities.

So, while we must teach our children to have their own voice and not be afraid to use it, we must also teach them to do it sensibly and to become better people by developing the ability to listen, to want to truly understand others. And to be more observant and attentive people and, therefore, more intelligent.

«Have a positive mind.»

I consider this teaching a very valuable one. It can be so much easier for kids to see the simpler, brighter, and more magical side of life, but as they get older, that magic and joy can be lost. During adolescence there is a very difficult stage in which everything looks much more difficult than it is.

But you can give them the tools so that they do not lose their positive vision, so that they grow sure of themselves, looking to the future with optimism and happy. It is not about telling them not to cry, everyone should be able to express themselves and feel without restrictions, it is about teaching them to always look for the solution to the problem, to know that, whatever happens, there is a solution and it will be in their hands . Or, at least, you will always have someone you can count on to help you find her, with a smile.

It is one of the most powerful weapons to gain and that you can pass on.

«Treat others as you would like to be treated.»

Putting yourself in someone else’s situation is something that is difficult to learn and when we are adults we can easily forget. Our problems overwhelm us, the traditional labor market teaches us to step on the partner to climb a professional step. As a society, we don’t treat those who don’t fit well. And that lack of empathy and tolerance ends, somehow, also spreading to the little ones.

We know full well that the world would be just as we would like it to be if we all behaved decently, simply by treating others with the respect we would like to receive.

And sometimes the little details have the biggest effects. You can start by teaching your child the importance of greeting, giving thanks, not only when they do you a favor or gift, but also when they serve your plate in the restaurant or give you change in the store. When you are tempted to laugh at someone or a classmate, make it clear that just because someone is different is not a bad thing. But there is nothing good for anyone about being cruel to others and making them feel bad about being themselves. And, above all, not to insult or attack anyone.

Teach them the satisfaction of making others smile. And always remember that every action and word has consequences, so it is always better to choose those that have good consequences.

You should not be hard on him if he has a hard time saying thank you or good morning, especially to people he is not familiar with; remember that the most important lesson of all is the one we explain from the example.

So think that the greatest leadership job you do in life is to be the best example so that your children, whoever they are or decide to dedicate themselves to what they want in the future, are always safe, happy and kind people.

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